Monday, October 09, 2006

Tomorrow's the big day

Tomorrow would have been Caleb's first birthday.

I don't know what to say. I miss him.

I wish he was here to meet his little brother. I wish he was crawling all over the house. I wish I could see him chasing the cats. I wish I was getting the house ready for our friends and family to come over for his first birthday party. But, I'm not. He taught me so much. He made me the person I am today.

Caleb touched so many lifes. His work on earth was done. I wish it wasn't. I wish he could be here forever. I wish he was still here.

I hope they have birthday cake in Heaven. Caleb deserves to stick his head in some good sugary cake.

(While I'm typing this I'm listening Nolan sleep-farting over the baby moniter. Anyone want to change his diaper?)

Speaking of the gasman - Nolan has a weight check tomorrow. He is getting big. He has outgrown some of his up to 5lb clothes!


Trish said...

I just happened by your blog today and wanted to say I'm thinking of you an Caleb's 1st BD.
I'm a stillbirth survivor so I can relate.
I enjoyed your blog and my heart goes out to you.

sarah Furlough said...

My heart is with you. I know how much you miss Caleb. I miss Logan each day, and I can't begin to imagine how I will feel when his first birthday comes. I am thinking of you today. Just know you are a better person because of Caleb.

Rachel said...

I wanted to let you know I was thinking about you this morning. Caleb was an incredible little guy. He couldn't have asked for a better mom than you. We were all blessed to know him.

Hedda said...

Happy Birthday Wee Man!

You are missed.

Thank you for making your mom the person she is. She will be a better person for having you.

miraclebaby said...

I am so sorry he is not here with you...

Anonymous said...

I'm keeping up with you on your blog - heaven has everything good so I'm sure their is a cake for Caleb - chocolate just like his Mommy loves!

Know that I love you!

Momma Donna

The Mom said...

Heaven wouldn't be heaven without cake. Rest assured Caleb's gorging on some... hopefully chocolate. Happy birthday to Caleb.


Peg {is ready for Turkey Day!} said...

When someone you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure.

Happy Birthday baby Caleb!

Mrs. S said...

Hurray for Nolan outgrowing some of this clothes! That is extremely exciting.

Also, I know this is cheesy, but I am certain that Nolan will get to know his big brother through you, even though he won't have the chance to meet him in person for a very, very long time. I'm sure Caleb is looking down and keeping an eye on his little brother, even as we speak. After all, that's what big brothers are for, right?

Happy Birthday, Caleb.

Elizabeth said...

I don't know you or your family, but I have read your story. I am thinking of you, Cary, Caleb and your sweet little Monster today. Your story has touched my life and I just wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking about you guys all day today.

Happy Birthday Caleb!

Lucy Henry said...

People leave an impression on us but Caleb left an impression on others. He was and still is a blessing. Do you think when Heaven sings Happy Birthday to Caleb they will sing the song like our family does? You know we are all great singers!!!

Jeana said...

I can't say enough how privileged I feel that I was able to meet Caleb. He was a special baby that changed the lives of those around him. He taught me how precious life is and made my love for my boys grow even more. (I didn't know that was possible!!)

Happy Belated Birthday Caleb!! If you're like your mom, you are enjoying some chocolate cake.

Happy one month birthday to cutie pie Nolan.